Unfortunately, child predators exist, and they can be present in church environments. This topic is both uncomfortable and challenging. Common questions include: Who are they? How will I know if someone is one? Are there warning signs? Common false assumptions include: Why would a predator target our church? Predators are monsters—I would know one if I saw one. I know everyone who volunteers in our kids' area; they are friends, family, or people with strong recommendations. These responses can lead ministries to think, “We’re safe; there’s no need to be concerned.”

However, the truth is that child predators have spent years deceiving people and are skilled at choosing organizations where they know they will succeed or where their behaviors will not be questioned. When assessing an environment, predators look for easy access to kids and youth and opportunities to isolate them. This is why it’s crucial to understand some of the most common yet overlooked behaviors that may indicate a person is not a safe choice to be around children and youth.

These behaviors are known as red flags or warning signs. Remember, behavior alone is not an indication of guilt or proof of wrongdoing, but it is an intuitive marker that something may be off. When you observe behavior that makes you uneasy, that’s healthy skepticism. Healthy skepticism means you need to consider your gut feeling, pay closer attention, and gather more information.

Here are 20 possible red flags or warning signs:

1. Continually tries to access children, even if they have no ties to the program.

2. Has an excessive interest in a child or group of children.

3. Asks to take pictures of or with children who aren’t theirs.

4. Gives gifts or pays special attention to a specific child.

5. Lingers outside the children’s area too often and for too long.

6. Frequently offers favors to "help you out" with the children but isn’t a screened and approved volunteer.

7. Repeatedly enters children’s bathrooms and doesn’t respect their privacy.

8. Ignores personal boundaries with inappropriate touching or behavior that blurs the line between affection and misconduct, such as excessive hugging or tickling.

9. Intentionally isolates or separates a child from their friends, family, or peers.

10. Asks or encourages a child to keep secrets about their relationship, conversations, or forbidden activities.

11. Uses digital platforms to make contact without parental permission, including excessive texting, emailing, or engaging children through gaming without parental oversight.

12. Becomes aggressive, defensive, hostile, or angry when questioned about their interactions with kids.

13. Pushes the limits of established policy to see how far they can go before someone reacts or questions them.

14. Overrides the authority of established policies and guidelines, such as child protection policies, comprehensive screening, the two-adult rule, or bathroom procedures.

15. Normalizes inappropriate behavior by encouraging children to view explicit material or engage in behaviors unsuitable for their age.

16. Displays favoritism toward a single child over others.

17. Uses guilt, shame, or manipulation to control or exploit a child, making the child feel responsible for the predator’s emotions.

18. Mentions topics that are not age-appropriate, such as sexual jokes, inappropriate comments, or innuendos in front of children.

19. Develops a fast, intense bond with a child or youth, overriding normal social or relational limits.

20. Gives children gifts, money, or special privileges without reason or parental knowledge and permission.

Be aware of these red flags, establish proper child protection policies and guidelines, and, if you suspect abuse or observe concerning behaviors, take action. Taking steps to reduce risk helps deter bad behavior and makes it more difficult for predators to operate.

Angela Lewton is KidCheck’s child protection specialist. KidCheck provides secure children’s and youth check-in systems. Angela focuses on the latest child safety research and trends. She is passionate about equipping organizations to improve child safety.