Have you ever seen how a sword is made? Recently, I heard this amazing analogy about crafting steel swords, and it blew my mind.

When swordsmiths forge a blade, they don’t aim for perfection in the way you’d think. A sword that’s perfectly rigid—no flaws, no flexibility—is actually more likely to snap under pressure. But a sword with a few soft spots, just the tiniest bit of give, is much more durable. Why? Because strength isn’t always about being hard and unbending. Sometimes, it’s about resilience —the ability to bend, to flex, to take a hit and keep going.

Sounds a little like ministry, doesn’t it?

Strong, But Not Invincible

In kids ministry, we often feel like we have to be superheroes. Capes on. Smiles ready. Emotions tucked away. Nothing to see here—we’ve got snacks to pass out and memory verses to sing!

But real talk: ministry is hard. Especially when you’re leading. There are times when people let you down, when resources run thin, when a beloved volunteer walks away, or when your own energy tank is on E. And in those moments, it’s tempting to pretend everything’s fine. To stay strong, stoic, and steel-clad.

But what if that very act—the refusal to show weakness—is what actually makes us more likely to snap?

The Power of the Soft Spot

Just like that sword, you were never meant to be flawless. God didn’t call you to be a perfect leader. He called you to be a faithful one. And sometimes, being faithful means letting others see your soft spots.

It means admitting when you're tired. Owning up to mistakes. Asking for help. Saying, “I need prayer,” without feeling like it makes you less of a leader.

In fact, those moments of vulnerability can be the very thing that strengthens your team. When you’re real, you give others permission to be real too. When you model dependence on God in your weakness, you teach your kids and your volunteers how to do the same.

Remember what Paul said in 2 Corinthians 12:9—“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Paul goes on to say he delights in his weaknesses. Delight! Can you imagine?! That’s a leader who understands that soft spots are sacred spaces where God’s strength shows up.

Lead With Grit and Grace
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Being a strong leader doesn’t mean being the toughest person in the room. It means showing up with both grit and grace. It means leading with purpose, while still holding space for pain. It means laughing loud, serving big, and crying when you need to. It’s okay to be strong with soft spots.

Kids don’t need perfect leaders—they need authentic ones. They need to see what it looks like to trust God in the middle of the mess. They need to know that faith doesn’t erase hardship, but it gives us the strength to walk through it.

So next time you feel like you’ve got to hide your hurt or pretend you’ve got it all together, remember the sword. The strongest blades have just a little give. And that’s what makes them last.

Keep leading. Keep loving. And let those soft spots remind you—and everyone around you— where your true strength comes from.

But don’t do it alone—every leader needs support. If burnout is creeping in or you just need someone in your corner, find your people. Whether it’s fellow kids ministry leaders in your area or denomination, or a ministry coach (like me!), you weren’t meant to carry it all.

That’s why I created the Kids Ministry SOS Kit: 5 Signs of Burnout + What to Do About It — a free guide with a burnout quiz, warning signs, practical tips, and encouragement.

Want your copy? Email me at hello@christenclark.org with “SOS Kit” and I’ll send it to you.

Remember: strength grows in community. Sometimes the bravest thing you can do is ask for help.

Christen Clark is a speaker, ministry coach, and consultant with 17 years in full-time church ministry and holds a master's degree from Dallas Theological Seminary. She is the creator and host of the Collide Kids Podcast, fostering fun and meaningful faith conversations for families. Christen and her family happily reside in Cumming, Georgia. Go to christenclark.org to connect with her today!